In the movie, 'It’s a Wonderful Life', an “old soul” George Bailey has grown up in a small town with big dreams. He’s a kind-hearted man, giving generously of himself, often to the detriment achieving his dreams of building bridges and traveling to far off lands. After being accused of embezzlement by Mr. Potter, in desperation, George gets down on his knees and begs to God. This, too, is an act of faith; pure supplication to some higher power for redemption. And this, is typically the normal human view of how faith is utilized in life.
George makes a request to God, that he wishes he had never been born and soon arrives AS-2, (Angel Second Class) Clarence Oddbody; his guiding angel, sent from Heaven to help George realize the glorious life he already has. Clarence grants his wish and George is given a chance to experience what life would be like, if he had never been born. It’s through this dark, nightmarish, experience that he connects with his inner self, the life of God. And faith is transformed from a supplication to a higher power to a belief and embodiment of the goodness that is in each and every one of us.
Without Faith, George would not have ever gotten over his accident and loss of hearing in his ear. Without Faith, he wouldn't have prevented Mr. Gower from possibly poisoning a client. Without faith, he wouldn't have become an inspiration and community icon to so many in Bedford Falls who remained faithful to him in his darkest hour.
Near the end of the film, Clarence writes an inscription inside a book for George which reads, “remember, no man is a failure who has friends." George is given the gift of restored faith in his life and gratitude for simple acts that make a difference in the lives of some many people. And he is shown that faith in God is different that faith of God. Pure faith is a spiritual conviction, an embodiment of an idea and an inner knowing that God is as much within us as is all around us. It wasn't until George realized that his belief in his goodness was greater than any apparent lack that his life was regained and Clarence was granted his wings.
Principle is not bound by precedent. Thus, no matter what happened to me in my past, no matter what happens to me today, no matter what ever happens, I can always choose to believe with conviction that my source is pure and just. Faith is the substance of things hoped for (dreams for travel and prosperity and success) and the evidence of things unseen (the love and loyalty of a community bound together by kindness and character).
Recently I saw just how faith plays out in the lives of every day humans. First, I was at a local park with my son and my newly returned to me dog. We were just getting ready to leave, so my dog was on leash, yet, something caught my son's attention and he ran towards the parking lot. I saw in the distance my ex-husband and his girlfriend and their new dog. I watched as my son played in earnest with them and the new dog and how my own dog, once part of that family, suffered in agony in the torture to see them in a distance but yet not be let free to run to them.
It wasn't but a month ago that my ex-husband called me to remove this dog from his home because he had been bitten. He assured me that he had "beaten the shit out of him" and was anxious to have him removed from the premise forthwith. Yet, this day, the dog yearned to see him. Out of shear innocence and hope I let the dog go, in aspiration that there would be a happy reunion. But, alas, my ex-husband shrugged off our dog as if he'd never even know who he was. And our dog, confused, unrelentingly pursued his touch, his approval, his love. Oh, to have the faith of a dog.
I've come to realize that faith plays a huge part in forgiveness. Without faith that there is something other than suffering, it can be intimidating to move forward. In the last year, I have been so mired in the apparent "loss" of something, that I failed to see that I can "choose" to see it all differently. I don't have to choose to suffer, I just do because it is what I've always done and that is what I was taught to do.... I can choose to say, well, sure, it may seem like I lost this and that and he treated me this way and such, but I choose love.
The truth is, no matter how his ego tells it, I willingly gave so much to him (beyond measure) and I accepted all of his treatment simply lovingly. Because he did not know what he was doing and we cannot fault him for that, what else is there to say?
As much as I have resentment towards him for "what I perceive he has taken from me" I also know that I gave of everything freely. I loved this man so very much. I helped him without desire for anything in return. Yet, honestly, there is a part inside of me that wants to curse him for what I have "lost" and feel some kind of retribution for the "wrongs" committed.
Yet, then I realize that that kind of thinking will only keep me stuck. I will only feel let down, deflated and defeated at the end of the day. Like George Bailey, my actions have far-reaching affects that, should I choose to not have been born, life would be less wonderful. And then I remembered that Principle is not bound by Precedent. Oh, thank God.
There is a power so much greater than our prayers, rituals and spells that might blow our minds should we see the truth as it really is. That is why folks who have come back from life/death experiences have shared one final piece of advice: live each day as if it were your last.
As much as I'd like to claim that I have some kind of power over the future of my son, I know in my heart that he is here on his own volition and he is on his own path. As much as I'd like to change the circumstance for how I've become who I am today, I can only give thanks for what I now have: namely Ziggy and Chulo among other many blessings.
Joel Goldsmith says to follow these simple principles to live a full and healthy life. I believe they are worth sharing.
~ Love "God" (or whatever spiritual entity you name it) with all your heart
~ Acknowledge that its entity is the only power/source/energy/life/law
~ Treat everyone else like you treat yourself; remember we are all mirrors (so if you treat yourself like shit, maybe you should reconsider)
~ Forgive - yourself and others
~ Pray for you enemies
~ Realize your infinite nature as an individualize expression of the Infinite Spirit
~ He that hath shall be given -- practice gratitude daily
~ Seek to demonstrate GOD qualities (i.e. love, kindness, grace, peace, joy, prosperity, etc.) and not THINGS
~ Meditate
~ Live in the NOW
I personally feel like if you do these things in earnest and with truth and veracity in your heart you will see a change in your life beyond valuable measure and which, will likely be subtle to the naked eye beyond measure.
So, if my ex-husband is out there, reading this blog, I'd like to say that I forgive him. I forgive that he was so self-absorbed and juvenile to behave the way he did and that I loved him so much I could no longer let him treat me the way he had been accustomed to treating me. I understand that he must have been confused and misdirected to behave as such and for that, I forgive him. I am thankful for the lessons he has given me. Most grateful for our son.
And I ask him to forgive me too because I wasn't innocent. I definitely lost my sense of self and became needy and intolerant. I was totally in love with him and I am unsure if he ever felt the same for me, but in the end it doesn't matter because I wanted only the best for him; as that is all that I continue to wish for him.
It's kinda weird not to blame or seek judgement and condemn. It's really sort of freeing, but at the same time a little nerve wracking because we, as humans, are so used to the drama. All I can say for myself is that I have learned, from a very classy lady, that surrender is the means to all ends, for those who are wise, just as George did, remember who they are.
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